Do You Want 2015 to be YOUR Year? Set Yourself Up to Win!

Year 2015 is here!

Do you want 2015 to be YOUR year?

I love new beginnings and letting go of the past.

However, new beginnings can also create anxiety, overwhelmingness, and fear.

So many of us make new year resolutions, vision maps, set goals and make promises to ourselves that this is going to be the year! Several days, weeks, or months go by and we feel disappointed, depressed, unmotivated or defeated.

I believe it’s easy to envision and set goals. The challenging part is following through.

You might feel excited and believe that you will manifest your desires.

However, that little voice in your head says, “Are you really going to do it this year? You know, you won’t. You’ve tried in the past and it hasn’t worked.”

How are you going to stick to it this year that’s different from last year?

Do you lack confidence in yourself to follow through?

How do you overcome that voice and push through to be consistent?

First, it takes willingness and determination.

Secondly, it is making a choice, not just once, but EVERYDAY that you will follow though.

Third, it is to reprogram the negative internal voice to “I can do it! I have everything it takes. I will ask for support when I need it. I owe it to myself. I’m worth the time and effort it takes.”

Over the years, whenever I wanted to change something in my life and wanted lasting change, I turned to someone for support.

It’s ok to admit that sometimes, we just can’t do it alone.

There are so many things you can use such as apps that remind you of your tasks, keep you organized, etc. However, what I found to be the most powerful and helpful has been to hire a coach or have someone hold me accountable.

I have always been a great employee to all my employers and since I now work for myself and from home, it’s a lot more challenging to stay on task.

When I need it, I hire a coach. It never fails, I set goals, and a few months later, it’s like magic, goals accomplished! I highly recommend you hire a coach if you truly want to follow through with a specific goal this year that has been too difficult for you to manifest on your own.

I am a coach and therapist and would love to support you, but if you are looking for a specific specialty, there are lots of great coaches out there. Find one you resonate with.

If you can’t afford a coach, ask a friend to be your accountability partner. You can even create a small group to hold each other accountable. Sometimes, that is all it takes.

Debbie Ford always said, “You can’t go to the Olympics without a coach.” So, if there is something that is so valuable to you, your health, relationships, well being, or finances, take action to set yourself up to win. You truly deserve it. If you don’t feel deserving, than that is the first place to start. You need to get the support you need to build up your confidence and worthiness.

I have clients who get really down on themselves because they feel like they should be able to change or do something on their own. They resist that they need support or can’t do it alone.

I believe this is common for many people. We want to feel good about ourselves and know that we can do things all on our own.

If you observe children, they can’t wait to do things on their own and feel so proud when they do. But what if we can’t or we do better with a support team?

The problem lies in what we make it mean about ourselves. If you can’t do something on your own, what do you make that mean about yourself? Do you make it mean that you are weak, incapable, not good enough or a failure?

In the shadow work, which is part of what I use in my coaching practice, the next step would be to own those shadow parts of yourself. You need to own weak, incapable, not good enough and failure. Each one of those qualities or shadows bear a gift and wisdom for you. Once you see the gifts of those qualities and have compassion for those parts of yourself, then they don’t have to act out and sabotage your goals or intentions.

So, what do you need to put into place for yourself to FOLLOW THROUGH this year?

Start with only one goal.

Don’t overwhelm yourself with multiple goals as that will often create a break down in your success. If you have more than one goal this year, start with just one of them.

Once you have mastered that goal or are consistent with the actions needed to accomplish it, add the second goal.

It might be the next week, a few weeks later or even months later. The beauty of it is that at the end of the year, you will have mastered many of your goals and have lasting change.

If you try to do it all at the same time, it’s usually unrealistic and end up giving up or giving in to the old story of “I am not good enough, I can’t do this, what was I thinking, I’m a failure, etc.”.

When you get caught up in that vicious cycle, the internal negative voice gets really loud and you have proven your old story right, that you couldn’t do it.

If you start with one, it’s easier to add to it once you have implemented it and made it a habit. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

Notice if that is one of your patterns. Taking baby steps will create the changes you want.

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” Lao Tzu

Set yourself up to win this year and take baby steps!!!!!!!




Sonia Hankin, LMHC

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